Accolades, Accolades, Accolades. The Flitternaut Rolls On!

Pardon my slackness on this one my fellow Freaks! For some reason I forgot to post about this a while back when Josh picked up another CAMIE award! This gong for Nancy Drew was Josh's second consecutive gong and for those who don't know the CAMIE's celebrate outstanding, uplifting films emphasizing character and morality.

While we can't get a new Evan Almighty film every year, we can count on Josh Flitter finding the best and most unrelentingly conservative scripts in the game!

Pollsters are already giving favourable odds for Flitter to take out next year's CAMIE's with Ace Ventura Junior (AVJ). I'm predicting a clean sweep, including best actor/crusader of the light, best unnecessary sequel, best on-screen fart, best anti-muslim overtones.

The Many Moods Of Josh Flitter Vol. XXVI: Feelin' Nautical (Turbulent Times In Flitter Valley)

I've been doing my usual Flitter watch, which involves hacking his MacBook's iSight and watching him Skype chat with Shia on the set of Transformers too (sadly, Shia was unable to convince Michael "Dickface" Bay to give ol' JF a role as Burgertron), but in my (hot) pursuit of Flitter-deets I've come across something confusing and plainly frightening. Guyz, I'm concerned that Joshy might've fallen in with a rather shady crowd. Look at this snap I borrowed from his Harddrive.
No your eyes don't lie! There is so much wrong with this picture. For starters, that's a medium thick shake in Josh's hands, not the Double XL Bladder-Buster he's usually found with. And it also shows Josh hanging ten with a rag-tag band of urban pirates. The worst kind of pirates. Who knows what kind of mess these concrete crawling marauders have gotten Josh into. For all we know Josh and this posse could've been robbing costume shops all over the city and making soccer mums walk the plank. Sure the plank would be flat on the ground but I'd still be worried about the spate of rolled ankles which resulted from this kind of rough-housing.

Josh, I know you're gunning for that Waterworld sequel just as much as the rest of us, but this is not the way to make it happen.

I beg you, come back to us.

Come back to me.

Yours 4eva,

Dave (Freak #1.)

Poll! What Poorly Considered Jim Carrey Sequel Should Flitter Star In Next?

It's time to have your say all you Flitter-Freaky dudes and dudes pretending to be chicks on MSN out there! What with the success of Ace Ventura Jr (AVJ) already sweeping the box office - this baby's not even out yet and already the midnight screening tix have sold out in Kuwait! - the question has arisen of which Jim Carrey film from the '90s should be remade/sequelized next (obviously starring our heavy-set hombre Josh Flitter, duh!).

See the options - complete with probably synopsis' - below and then get voting!!

A) The Cable Kid

Flitter steps into Jim Carrey's sizeable overalls as a portly Cable installing prodigy! He'll install the Food Network in your place and then slip into a diabetic coma on your couch. Woah.

B) Liar Liar 2: Liar Liar Liar Liar

With his pa in the pen for purgery (possible tag line?) Josh Flitter continues his father's legacy as a lawyer that can't lie. He can't lie about his age, his height, or shopping at Big & Not So Tall. Hilarity.

C) The Truman Capote Show

Get this, it's the Truman Show meets Capote! Flitter plays Truman Capote, who on the success of his award-winning book In Cold Blood buys a tropical island for himself (they were heaps cheap back then, you know). The only problem is that the island is from the future! And it's inhabitated by the cast of Lost! And is being filmed for a primetime reality show! How will these two tribes live side by side? If ruining one film wasn't enough to make you weep like you just killed a puppy, then how about dephiling TWO films!?

D) Other

Josh Flitter plays Jim Carrey's _____ , but this time he has to ____ and throughout a ____ poops on him. I smell a winner.

Get voting!!